my heart hurts. I feel like I’m going to throw up.

I miss him. SO much. I’m holding back crying because if I start I’ll get hysterical. 

I just need him to get help, get better, and come back to me. I will wait for him. I just ugh.

ugh ugh ugh.

Anonymous asked: You don't know if it isn't for the better so tread lightly. You will help him get help and if he changes, then wonderful, if he doesn't, then you've done your best and given it your all. There's no sense in being wary just yet and I hope you're not too harsh on yourself. You're too lovely to be so mean to yourself.

This is the best advice anon. <3 Any other wisdom for me? I really appreciate this.

I’ll be off for a while. Things got hectic. If you need me (or are willing to talk) message me for my email. I got back together with my boyfriend when I probably shouldn’t have. I’m desperate and melting under sadness. I know I can’t be with him because I know he won’t change or get better. And see, if he gets help and treatment, I still want to be with him. But he has to get help first.

ok so. just hold on for me guys.